Wednesday, 01 February 2006, 22:10:20 EST

Quicksand. Some times I feel like I am pulling myself out of quicksand. It is as if I had been walking along, not paying attention, and suddenly found myself neck deep in the stuff. I feel as if I am having to pull myself out of it; slowly dragging myself to the other side. Some times I will be sitting in class, or doing homework, and think, "how am I going to do this?" To which I reply, "just suck it up and do it!" One more step closer to the other side. Maybe I am just tired of school and living pay check to pay check. Every day is nothing but wake up, go to work/school, come home, and do it again the next day.

I must admit, that since I started taking classes again fall semester 2004, I have come a long way as far as school is concerned. I still have a long way to go, though. Out of a 120 hour program, I have completed sixty-five hours; seventy-four if I manage to pass this semester, and it will be tough to do so. The two courses I am taking this semester are two of the hardest I have ever taken. Numerical Methods is a survey course and it is still a senior level course; the work isn't easy. The Transition to Higher Level Mathematics course is more my speed but it is vastly different than anything I have taken in the past year and a half. There isn't any calculating in the class; it is all about the logic of proofs and how to write them.

Part of the problem is how stupid I was when I started school. I wish I had been smart enough to understand what college is and why I should have been focusing solely on completeing it. I should be applying for my second degree this semester, not planning for the next semester of a bachelor degree. But, I suppose I wouldn't have appreciated the degree as much as I will when I eventually graduate.

Any way, it is getting late. I didn't mean to sit here and write for an hour; I just needed to get it out of my head, I suppose.

Traveling somewhere, could be anywhere
There's a coldness in the air but I don't care
We drift deeper
Life goes on
We drift deeper
Into the sound